Being emotionally intimate with yourself is like using one of your muscles. The more you use your muscle the stronger you become, the healthier you feel and the more comfortable you are with in you. It takes practice. If you do not use your muscle it will atrophy.
Using your emotional intimacy muscle is your ability to express your deepest feelings and secrets. The ability to be emotionally intimate with yourself or another is hugely dependent on whether you feel safe within yourself. The keys here are acceptance, respect, and compassion for yourself. Also important, is the ability to not judge yourself for whatever you may be feeling or thinking. The more you identify, feel, heal and release your OWN feelings, and hear your thoughts, the more connected you are with yourself. The more connected you are to yourself, the more you understand yourself, can express your truth, determine what it is you desire and make decisions that honor you.
Here are some guidelines for you to use your “emotional intimacy muscle.”
Emotional Intimacy Guidelines
• Commit to being emotionally intimate with yourself.
• Recognize that you feel or think a certain way. Stating that you don’t feel or think anything about something in particular isn’t really being truthful with you. You are really judging your true feeling and thoughts and therefore denying or repressing them. You are alive, therefore, you feel and think. Feeling and thoughts are the gifts of being human.
• Identify what you are feeling and thinking. Keep at it until you get to the core of it. Sometimes you may say you feel or think a certain way because you are judging what it is you are REALLY feeling or thinking. Make sure what you say you feel or think is really what you are feeling and thinking, and not a mask to make someone else approve or accept you.
• Give yourself permission to feel or think whatever it is you are feeling or thinking. Once you have identified the feeling – go ahead and FEEL it!!!
• Accept that your feelings are your feelings, and your feelings are your sole responsibility to heal. When someone upsets you, realize that they are not responsible for your feelings. You are responsible for your feelings and healing them. They are solely responsible for their behavior not your feelings.
• Follow your feelings to their source. Get to the root cause of your unpleasant feelings. Remember that your mind will try to minimize your pain if you have any. Your mind is trying to protect you from feeling pain.
• Be honest with others and express your feelings and thoughts when you are ready. This is the only way you can live your truth and protect your boundaries.
Love Yourself! Inspiration Assignment
Journal about the following:
1) Do you find it easy to use your “emotional intimacy muscle?”
2) Are you honest with yourself about what you feel or think? If no – why not?
3) Are you honest with others about what you feel or think? If no – why not?
4) Are you afraid of being vulnerable? If yes – why?
5) Are you afraid people will judge you for your thoughts and feelings? If yes – why?
6) Do you judge you for your thoughts and feelings? If yes – Why?
7) Do you want to live your truth? Express yourself? If yes – why is it important to express and live your truth? If no – why?
8) Do you want people to accept, respect and love you for you?
9) Do you accept, respect and love you for you?
You are so loved so love yourself just as much!